I was preparing to go into the hospital for knee surgery and wanted to wear some disposable contact lenses so I wouldn't have to worry about my gas permeable lenses while in the hospital.I had some disposables at home from the days when my kids were younger and we used to go swimming and floating down rivers a lot, but the expiration date on them had come and gone…like by ten years so I thought I'd better ask my eye doctor if they were safe to wear.
I walked into the eye doctor office and handed them to the assistant at the front desk and asked her my question. Her eyes got wide and she asked, "Are you wearing these?" "Well, no, of course not, I wear gas perms, I have these to wear when I go swimming and I don't do that much…I'm wanting to know if they are safe to wear."
"Oh no, I don't think so!" she answered with a horrified look on her face. She turned to another assistant sitting at a computer, "She shouldn't wear these, should she? Look at that expiration date"
Glancing at the dates on the disposables, the other young woman got the same horrified look on her face. I sighed, I realized I was much older then either one of them but it's not like the original date on the lenses predated either of their dates of birth for heaven's sake. "I am going into the hospital for knee surgery and just wanted to wear them there so I don't have to worry about my gas perms getting lost."
"You should not wear these!" the computer lady replied handing them back to me.
"Okay, okay, I get it, but can I buy some more disposables that are in date? Just a package to get me through the hospital stay?" I asked taking back the strip of disposables she held at arms length like they were going to explode any minute.
"Well, let me see, oh I don't even see those disposables listed on your record," she gasped while punching the keyboard.
"Well, I actually got them way before the expiration date so…"
"Umm, well, I can't get you anything because those are so old they aren't even listed on here. It says you wear gas perms and the dates on those are even… oh wow."
"Yes, I know, I wear gas perms and they are not new. But I take really good care of them, no scratches..." I stopped and took a breath, "Look, I just need some disposables to use temporarily."
"I can't give you any because we don't have your prescription for disposables."
"You can't use the prescription for my gas perms?" I asked getting a little worn out from all of this. My knee was hurting from standing so long.
"Oh no, no, no…that is something different. I'll have to ask the doctor if it's okay and get a new prescription."
"I was just in here a few months ago…"
"I still have to ask the doctor."
"Okay…I can wait."
"She's not in yet this morning."
"Oh."
"What is your phone number? I can call you after she gets in and I ask her."
I gave her my number which is also listed on my patient screen, as is my gas perm prescription and my age, height, weight, line of work, insurance, eye color… but whatever.
I hobbled back out the door to my car. I wondered how many things we use on a daily basis go out of date?I mean I know there are expiration dates on milk, canned foods but why do some things last forever and other things don't? I have a car that is seventeen years old and it is still running great, but all the plastic in the car like the seat belt covers, and the clips for the visors have become brittle and broken. Then I wondered if my gas perm contacts which are also plastic were going to become brittle and break in my eyes at some point in the future.
How come they don't make all this stuff out of the plastic used in star foam? You know those containers that were invented for fast food hamburgers? A few years back a study was done that found these containers last like one hundred years in landfills and everyone was strongly urged to quit using them!
I took a deep breath and hoped I would make it back to work in one piece without having my eyes fall out, my car fall apart and strand me in the middle of the street where I wouldn't be able to walk because I need a new knee…oh no, horrified at the next thought that came to mind; the new knee I was getting was made of metal and PLASTIC. What would happen if that plastic started falling apart inside my knee? Do I really want a plastic and metal knee put inside my body?!!
Wait, I wondered;could I get a knee made of star foam?
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